By Vince Wishart
In the journey towards personal growth and self-improvement, it is essential to confront the saboteurs that hinder our progress. These internal critics, often disguised as protective voices, can undermine our well-being and hinder our path to success. As a Therapeutic Life Coach, I am here to guide you through understanding and overcoming these saboteurs, paving the way for a more fulfilling life.
Judge Master Saboteur: Breaking Free from Self-Criticism The Judge is a universal saboteur that criticizes both ourselves and others. It may manifest as stress, anxiety, anger, or guilt, leading to a mistaken belief that its voice is a form of tough love. Recognizing and challenging this saboteur is the first step toward self-compassion. One important thing to realize about this saboteur is that is the most important one. The Judge instigates all of the others. It is the Master Sabateur
Stickler: Liberating Yourself from Perfectionism The Stickler thrives on constant frustration and the never-ending pursuit of perfection. By acknowledging that perfectionism is not always beneficial and embracing self-acceptance, you can break free from the cycle of stress and unrealistic expectations.
Pleaser: Balancing Giving and Receiving The Pleaser seeks acceptance and affection by constantly flattering others, often neglecting personal needs. By understanding that gaining affection indirectly is not a sustainable path, you can find a balance between helping others and prioritizing your own well-being.
Hyperachiever: Redefining Success and Happiness Dependent on external success for happiness, the Hyperachiever can lead to unsustainable workaholic tendencies. Discovering that self-acceptance is not conditional on external validation allows for a healthier and more balanced approach to success.
Victim: Reclaiming Emotional Energy The Victim is emotionally charged and often displays a martyr streak. By recognizing that others cannot provide sustained happiness, you can redirect emotional energy towards healthier pursuits.
Hyperrational: Balancing Logic with Emotion The Hyperrational saboteur may alienate others with an intense impatience for emotions. Acknowledging that emotional intelligence is equally important fosters better relationships and understanding.
Hypervigilance: Overcoming Constant Anxiety This saboteur instills intense anxiety about potential threats. Understanding that non-stop vigilance is not the best way to care for oneself allows for a more relaxed and balanced perspective. A typical conspiracy theorist operates in this zone. When we are hypervigilant, we can not think coherently because we are in a fight-or-flight state. We are not coherent. Our autonomic nervous system is maxed, and rational thought is unachievable.
Restless: Embracing Peace and Contentment Constant restlessness can lead to a lack of peace and contentment. Discovering that being busy does not equate to living life fully enables a more mindful and fulfilling existence.
The Controller: Surrendering the Need for Control Driven by anxiety, the Controller seeks to take charge and bend others to their will. Recognizing that relinquishing control can lead to more positive results fosters healthier relationships and personal development.
Avoider: Facing Unpleasant Confrontations The Avoider tends to avoid unpleasant confrontations, causing delays and conflict avoidance. Acknowledging that positivity should not mean avoiding problems allows for more proactive problem-solving.
In contrast to these saboteurs, lies the Sage within you—a deeper and wiser part that holds the keys to unlocking your true potential. The Sage possesses five essential powers that, when harnessed, can guide you towards a more fulfilling life:
Explore with Curiosity and an Open Mind
Empathize with Yourself and Others: Cultivate Compassion
Innovate New Perspectives
Navigate and Choose in Line with Underlying Values
Activate and Take Decisive Action Without the Saboteurs
As we embark on this transformative journey together, embracing the Sage within will empower you to navigate life's challenges with resilience, creativity, and grounded decisiveness. Through self-discovery and mindful coaching, you can break free from the grip of saboteurs and embark on a path of holistic well-being and fulfillment. Your journey to a more authentic and empowered self begins now.
If you would like some one-on-one coaching or to join some group sessions, feel free to reach out via email, and we can put you on a waiting list for the next group. Learning how to work with these, and learning how to have them work for us and an aligned team member is life-changing.
An experienced facilitator, Therapeutic
NLP Life Coach, Registered Therapeutic Counsellor, and community builder, Vince has been running men's groups for 6+ years. Read Vince’s Full Bio