Updated: Jan 22
Pain & Shame Live Underneath Addiction
Addiction is desperation attempting to escape pain.
Trauma is the hidden cause of addictions. A traumatic event happens, causing pain. When that pain is not seen or heard by caring others, it turns to shame. IE: I'm not worthy to be heard. This leads to a strong belief that is carried on through one's life until the we engage in the healing process.
Subconscious beliefs like I’m not good enough or not worthy of Love get formed. We see (perceive) through the eyes of our wounds and the cycle of pain and addiction continues.
“At the core of addiction is a deep sense of shame about the self. Often the shame extends to the whole family Blame is rooted in shame. Blame is not only ineffective it's incorrect and focuses on shame. Nobody chooses to be an addict.” - Gabor Mate
Trauma causes disconnection from ourselves and others.
In addiction, using is the way we stay disconnected from the pain & shame inside ourselves.
Social “masks” are a way we hide our shame from others.
Connection is the Key to Healing
Agenda-free attention: We reach others
when we listen without blame or judgment or agenda. This compassionate attention is key to healing - both directed inward and out toward others.
Through connection in counseling - we can support you to connect with yourself compassionately and heal the underlying wounds of addiction.
The group connection & dynamics in our Support Circles, Relationship Courses, & Transformative Arts Events are extremely beneficial for therapeutic & learning
Our recovery offerings are as follows:
Wellbriety Talking Circles: A first nations based approach to recovery which works with the medicine wheel and elders daily meditations. We sit in a sacred circle where all are
equal no matter where they are at.
Wellbriety Step Groups: Focuses on Inter-generational trauma and why this is not the attendee's burden to bear. Only healing it is.
Women's Self Care Support Circles: An opportunity to develop Self Love and nurturing practices through creativity, connection, & vulnerable sharing in a safe supportive circle.
Men's Peaceful Warrior Circles: Where men go to talk about men’s stuff
- The Man cave of Healing through Vulnerability
Addiction is characterized by lack of connection.
This circle is not focused on recovery but on healing through connection.
These weekly circles serve to support men to be spiritual warriors.
Experiential exercises to dive deep into our inner working in a supportive therapeutic environment. Anger release, trauma re-enactments to make a new decision in a heightened emotional state that transforms our belief systems and our shifts the way our subconscious mind stores information.
Men understand men's stuff. We are taught to be strong, not to show our emotions. Be a man we were told.
The Greatest Strength is Vulnerability
Finding your way back to real connection in these relationships is one of the most impactful things anyone can do to create greater wellbeing, emotionally, mentally, and even physically.
Each session we work with a theme. Name cards will be pulled and the attendee who pulled the card, will read out the name. That person will be asked if they want to share. They can then choose to share or pass to the next person's name whose card is pulled. Then that person can share what is up for them at that time.
As the facilitator I will intuitively tune to the needs of the person and offer an experiential exercise to help transform or heal that individual, busting the patterns that keep one stuck.
I am very excited to bring this much needed medicine to the men who are looking to level up their spiritual walk. You are not alone.
Men's Peaceful Warrior Retreats
Mostly open to ones who have completed a set of steps and are looking for a deeper into their own potentiality. Many of our activities will be outdoors. Medicine hikes where we exist in the natural realms in connection with all my relations; examining the plants and medicines of the land. Building shelters, and learning how to exist outdoors and stay warm in any condition. Relearning the old indigenous ways of rights of passage, ceremony, foods of the land, the seasons of the medicine wheel, how it relates to the directions and animal totems within. The pre-requisite is the Wellbriety step group as this is the continuation of the steps and the medicine wheel teaching, the application of what we learned. Some wilderness survival is also involved. How to light a sacred fire, how to fast and connect deeply with Unci Maka our Sacred Grandmother. How to connect with all my relations. The winged ones, the tall standing one legged elders, the one that crawl, the ones that swim, the 4 leggeds, the winds of the sacred directions and the ancestors that live there; how to give offerings to those ones in good way. There will be a sweat lodge at the beginning and end, and because of this we will not charge for this service,
and a blanket will be put out for donations.
Senior Recovery Retreats: These events are for long timers in recovery and include many elements of the above retreats. These groups support these leaders through a trauma informed lens of recovery.
I’m excited to support men in this capacity as individuals and as a group.
Please feel welcome to email me to find out more.
An experienced facilitator, NLP Life Coach, Registered Therapeutic Counsellor, community builder, Vince has been running men's groups for 6+ years. Read Vince’s Full Bio