Men's Peaceful Warrior Circles

Part of a series of blog articles regarding Peaceful Warriors by Vince Wishart Thurs Mar 3, 2022

When we think of warriors, we may think of a Samurai with blood all over their blade, or perhaps an army guy like Rambo, Maybe a Conan type character. Firstly, let's tune into what a warrior is:

Stack Exchange looks at the differences between warriors and soldiers to give context:

"Poetically, a warrior is one who lives for the fight, and a soldier is driven by duty, and may have no love for fighting.

A soldier seems to imply someone who is in the army and has been trained by some militia.

A warrior seems to imply a more barbaric figure, or at least, someone who fights, but isn't necessarily part of a state army, but is fighting for personal reasons.

The next difference implied is a soldier who has discipline, and works together with other soldiers as a team to form an army. They march, move and stop at the same time. Warriors don't do this, and although many warriors might fight in the same army, the term "warrior" implies that there is no discipline, (at least self-discipline) and that they just move of their own accord.

To be a soldier is to fight for a living -- it is an occupation. To be a warrior is to have that ingrained code of conduct that was vastly more present in the olden days. Today, one is not usually a warrior in the literal sense. It is far more common to refer to someone who fights as a soldier. The terms are definitely not synonymous because of the nuanced history behind each."

What the heck is a Peaceful Warrior then?

Dan Millman wrote a book called The Way of the Peaceful Warrior. It is in my top ten all-time favourite books. I have gifted away more copies of it than I can count. How do we as men hide behind our bravado, our presentation of ourselves, that we feel the people in our lives want us to be? What masks do we put on to navigate in this world? What would happen if we left that mask at home just once? How would be received then, if we showed up as our authentic selves? It is not about fighting, except for those inner battles, standing tall and facing what we can. It's viewing life as St Augustine prayed:

"Lord I pray not to lighten the load, but for stronger shoulders to carry the load".

A peaceful heart when facing change is the goal. The warrior spirit comes into play when we decide to do it in peace, calm, accepting the change and doing what it takes to remain in peace despite how daunting the change may seem to be. We find our inner stillness, not being affected by the outside world. Silence is the warrior's art. The warrior cuts his mind to ribbons with meditation, gaining insight, and surrender.

All circumstance is neither good nor bad. We put aside our anxiety, staying in the unknown. We remain in the great mystery of it without judgement, without giving it meaning. This is the Way of the Peaceful Warrior.

At LoveAlive, we have a creed: "We do not allow our outside circumstances, real or imagined, dictate to us our inside state"

If Perhaps, you are a man who has accepted the role of protector guardian, hunter, and provider, you are not alone. This is a societal typecasting, and the message is: We had better step up into that role or else suffer the consequences. This role can leave little room for processing our emotions, and inner workings. What are we as men passing on to our kids to be healed? Maybe we come from inter-generational trauma. Have we ever explored our attachment styles? Have we ever taken the opportunity to address these things? Men may feel as though they are often forgotten about as their needs are not important, as long as there is food on the table and the bills are paid, and the vehicles are running. Does anyone relate?

In today's societal norms, what room do we take for ourselves to do self-care? I don't mean watching the game with a beer in hand. What is done to take care of your spirit? Your woundedness, your inner child, what honour has there been for the sacrifices you have made for your family? For the deep inner reflection of your inside world?

Being a Peaceful Warrior is being poised, ready for anything, while remaining in a state of coherence and attunement. To do this well is a demonstration of mastery.

Attunement is to bring our inside world into harmony with the natural world.

Coherence is the quality of forming a unified whole. When we are in coherence, the world around us becomes the same. We begin to see the innocence behind the behaviours and actions of others.

Behind every behaviour, there is a positive intention. (NLP presupposition)